The Question

Some have asked, "What is the nature of an illuminated consciousness"? If I provide you with an answer that gives you some comfort and provides intellectual agreement, then what is the nature of that answer? Is it not the result of a mind that is caught in the illusion of the named and identified? Then what I reveal to you is the content of my own mind, a mind that may be in as much conflict and confusion as your own. When you ask a question that is the result of the minds content of inner conflict and confusion then it follows that whatever the answer, it supports either negatively or positively, that content. So if you realize your own true nature, the nature of the self which ask the question, then the answer is in the question.

The named and the defined is the static result of a mind that is looking for conformity and continuity. It is a trick of the mind to believe that a question seeks to find an answer to the unknown. Mind can only understand in terms of its content. Thought as the self can not fathom the unknown and make it a part of one's accumulated image. What satiates the desire to know is a limited understanding that is part of ones conditioned consciousness. It is in reality a continuation of ones own knowing. The truth can only be realized through negation of the known, which creates capacity for that which is beyond the self. The self that is one's sense of knowing. Ideological thinking is always centered around the premise that the self can know anything if given the facts. But that is its very limitation. The facts are the result of the ideological, so they are only a continuation of what has been. Because the mind is caught in a never ending circle of deductive and inductive reasoning, all knowing is dependent on the continuity of ones conditioning. The true reality of self, the actual, is in the moment when there is an absence of the continuity of knowing. The mind as a conceptual entity ceases the activity of trying to project itself into the moment.

Thought as the self is ever seeking to know. But it will only accept what contributes to the continuation of what has been. It moves away from the reality of what is in favor of the image of what should be as defined by its own self enclosing beliefs. The defined self cannot realize the true nature of that which is illuminated because "it is" when the self it not. An illuminated consciousness is without the conditioning of the past, which is to say it cannot be "known".

Why Are We Searching?

On a path along the way I was searching for "something", perhaps an experience of the mystical. Conformed to the idea that there is a spiritual presence that somehow would reveal itself in time, if only I practiced some discipline or listened to the teachings of a "master". So one searches and seeks out the "secret" studying the "illuminating" doctrines of ancient text's. And it goes on for years on end traveling from one end of the earth to the other. The search and the seeking become the future "accomplishment" the projected illusion of what is just around the corner, at the next Ashram, the next "enlightened" teacher. So it is with life, the mind is always looking to the future. What one intends to become or accomplish. So a person misses the moment because one is so self absorbed with projected self illusion. Then one day, it happens quite by accident, in a state of mind that is without intent. In a moment of clarity, when the self is not, you realize as Buddha did that change is in the moment. Somehow you come to a place of total psychological exhaustion a moment when all seeking ends. And despite all your accumulations of spiritual non-sense and the brainwashing of innumerable so called spiritual personalities, there is suddenly a freedom that is uninvited. The vulnerability of total surrender to the truth of the absolute moment. You are dumbfounded by the simplicity of the realization of a consciousness that is without the self. There is no movement, one is in a stasis of uninterrupted silence, a silence that is the absence of thoughts movement as the self that knows. One is awash in a wave of internal peace that knows no reason or desire.

So despite all ones efforts to live a life of spiritual greediness of accumulating the spoils of ones seeking, it is possible to realize a truth that is beyond ones self absorbed fantasy's. If a person can let go of all the accumulated junk that the mind clings to, then there is the possibility that one may realize a freedom that is beyond thoughts imaginings. As long as there is a self that knows and searches one will be caught in the illusion of a future. One will always be escaping the truth of the moment for the fantasy of minds self created illusion.

So what is one to do? Since it is your doing that is the problem, one needs to realize the truth about the self. To be totally aware in the moment of the obvious and hidden motivations of the self. You need to see without looking through your opinions and conclusions, which cloud the truth. To realize a consciousness that is not of the self. Then there is new vision, a new way of looking that sees as an absence rather than a presence. That absence is the unconditioned intelligence of a mind that is not caught in the self created illusions of that which thinks it "knows". Not knowing is the selflessness of life lived in the vulnerability of unattachment. Freedom that is beyond the named and identified.

A Life of Possiblity

Living in the moment and allowing the reality and truth of the actual to change you and make you more aware is to me the ultimate in spirituality. When you are choicelessly aware then it is possible to see clearly in the moment what you are. Not what you want to be or what you imagine yourself to be, but true reality that is absent the self of illusion and escape. It is very easy to get carried away with a mind that dwells in a post suggestive fantasy. Such a mind is always projecting the image of conceptual belief into the moment. It causes us not to see clearly the minds intent on "creating" the moment rather than experiencing the truth of it. Projected illusion is the result and the cause of reaction. Reaction is the continuity of what was, the continuation of the self created and self absorbed. Action is the outcome of a mind that is wholly in the moment and is not referencing the ideological and opinionated results of a fixed and permanent self image. An image that is the result of a self enclosing belief and conclusion.

A mind that dwells in the freedom of the moment is pliable and moves with the truth of the reality of what is. This is a mind that is open to the possibility of new discovery about the self and its relationship with existence. The fixed and self enclosed mind is a mind of conflict and violence. A mind that is free and open allows the possibility of that which is unconditioned. That which has a capacity to love and understand that is beyond the limitations of the self absorbed.

When you do not belong to any organization or fixed set of ideals then you are free to discover without the limitations of psychological authority. A person needs to come to the realization of just how ingrained their minds are in the ideals of the past. How that they are totally without anything resembling "free" thought. Since thought exist as the image of self, it is impossible for thought to be free. It is only when you have had a deep realization of the origin of thoughts movement as the self that freedom is. One must see clearly in the moment a reality that is absent the self that is formulating and concluding. Then one will be experiencing a capacity that is space for that which is not of the self. It is a consciousness that is unconditioned, freedom that is without the idea of freedom, a reality of vulnerability and acceptance.

The Historical Illusion

"Those that live in the past are doomed to repeat it". What does it mean to live in the past? What is the psychological impetuous for wanting to relive a memory? Is it to escape the newness of the moment? To avoid the unknown? The mind is seeking conformity in the reality of the moment. Conformity that is the psychological security of knowing. The known is the past, the memory of events that shape our response to the moment. Since the moment can never be the past our response is inadequate at best and is in actuality the response of a mind that is restricted by its particular beliefs. A mind that is controlled by the petty beliefs of the past is a small mind that is caught in the illusive interpretation of what has been. So one tries to emulate past experience, seeking its validation in the moment.

The ego/self is the past. A conglomeration of experiences and memorized teachings that have shaped the minds perceived image of self. It is the historical self illusion of what has been, projected into the moment. Most of us live out our lives in this haze of psychological illusion with only glimpses of true reality. A reality that we avoid, because we are seeking security in the known, in what has been. Such a mind references the historical to justify beliefs and suppress the truth of the moment. The historical leads one down the road of repetition, of past violence and conflict, or the confused conformity of "peaceful" solutions. But all historical projections are an attempt to avoid the perceived "chaos" of the unknown. The historical is prompted by fear of the unknown. All fear is the projected illusion of what might happen the impetuous for the avoidance of true reality.

In attempting to understand the human condition, we study the past, analyze it, and try to reach conclusions that seem to have validity in the moment. But the mind that is comparing and concluding is caught in the illusion of what has been. Memory conceptualizes the past and creates definition and meaning that is mixed with personal agendas, the goals of the self absorbed. This whole dynamic, is the psychological gamesmanship of a mind that is seeking to know through identification and attachment. It is the ego centric formulations of a self that is seeking justification for the known and its application in the moment. But in reality it is the repetitious non-sense of a self that is seeking validation for ones beliefs, a fantasy that is grounded in the illusion of the past. Historical fact is only fact or truth in the moment that it occurred. It has no relevancy in this moment except that it is simply the past, the memory of what has been. But it can never be again no matter what the circumstance. The life that we may give it is simply our own desire to escape the moment. It is important to allow the past to die so that one can move forward without the baggage of what has been. This is a new day a new moment that has in reality no connection to the past. This is really hard for most people to comprehend because they are conditioned to think in terms of the continuity of a connected existence. It is the minds conceptual fantasy of time as the movement of self. The absolute moment is the only true reality, all else is thoughts illusion of a self that knows.

The Celebration of Life

A few days ago I was discussing freedom and what it means to be free with some friends. One person had expressed trepidation and fear about what was going to happen in the immediate future. There were financial concerns that were pressing and needed to be addressed. With the current financial crisis and the uncertainty of job opportunities it seemed that both were in much fear and anxiety. It is difficult to realize the beauty of the moment when the mind is creating the complexity of perceived angst that is the result of attachment. I indicated to them that what is, is the reality of the moment it is neither good nor bad. One must allow the moment to happen no matter the circumstance. When a person is free of identification and attachment then there is no determination as to what should be. There is only acceptance. If one does not accept the moment then one tries to escape into the illusion and angst of the desired and projected.

An illuminated consciousness moves with the moment not seeking solution or escape. It is an intelligence which moves with the gravitational pull of the circumstances, not fighting or resisting, but allowing life to move you in a natural direction. Because one is "freedom" there is no angst of material or psychological loss. This is very difficult to understand because most people are prisoners of a conditioned consciousness that is attached to the accumulated, and defined by the material and psychological image of self. To such a mind loss becomes the perceived ending of the self and may result in deep psychological depression and thoughts of self destruction. If a person is totally free then one is unaffected, because you are not grounded in the illusion of a self that is captive of the known.

There is an old saying that goes, "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade". It means love life and celebrate your existence no matter your circumstance. If you have lost everything, realize that it is a new beginning for you. Realize that you are free of everything, find the extraordinary beauty of the moment that you have missed because you were preoccupied with accumulating and hording. Live in the insecurity of the moment and celebrate the poverty of the self, for now it may be possible for you to realize the truth of an intelligence that has been covered over by the immunity of the self. You have the opportunity to walk away from all your conflict and confusion. Do you have the passion to leave it all behind and realize a new and totally different person. A person who loves without condition, therefore lives in the peace and joy of the moment.

When a person is free of the past, of all the accumulated junk that we allow to define us, then an extraordinary peace comes over us. The moment becomes the eternal. Ones consciousness realizes an intelligence that is beyond knowing. It is a celebration of life that is without motive or reason, it is simply the full and complete realization of the unconditioned true self.

An Iconoclastic Existence?

What does it mean to live an iconic existence? Fundamentally it means the way in which we acquire experience that becomes the attached identity of self. Icon mentality starts very early in life. We are taught to look up to those who present an example. We are told that we must emulate those who are perceived to be of outstanding character and accomplishment. But what actually takes place in the psyche that develops through identification with icons? As is often the case in life we discover that as we gain experience those icons that we once revered are discredited, modified or replaced with others that have similar attributes. So in the mind we are looking to emulate, to find meaning and definition that is the result of the experiential, of knowing what we should be like. This knowing leads us to believe that the answers to life problems are found outside the self, in icons of authority.

An icon of authority is anything that establishes an ideal requiring psychological and/or physical conformity to one degree or another. The self seeks identity and definition with the icon and its underlying doctrines or concepts. The authority of the icon becomes the authority of the self. One conforms to a mind set that in essence worships the icon. Worship does not mean that one necessarily believes all tenants of an icon, it means that one gives creditability to ones established belief in the iconic self, which is the result of the icons influence. The iconic self is a persons psychological identification with the icon. In essence all icon worship is worship of the self.

An icon is an object, person, concept or event that the mind creates a psychological ideal or ideology around. The ideal is the authority of self that results in conformity to the tenants and images of an icon. It is the self that knows and is influenced by the external. But the known is never the reality of the moment. A person who lives through the icons of an ideal, lives in the illusion of the self. Such a mind is trapped by its attachment to an ideal which can only lead to conflict and confusion. To be totally free one must be iconoclastic. It is the illumination of the absolute moment which is the dissipation of the self that knows. To be iconoclastic means that you are negating all fixed images and concepts that are the result of a mind that is trapped by the authority of the self and its ideology. It is the negation of all attachments that give rise to dogmatism and fanaticism in the extreme and all images that are the result of identification and conformity.

Iconic attachments are generally very deep subconscious longings that promote an ideology of becoming. One is always dissatisfied with ones present circumstance, so the mind escapes into the illusion of iconic attributes. A person is especially susceptible to icons of a religious or spiritual nature because they are the ultimate escape from of all that is unexplainable and temporal. If you realize that you have been iconically brainwashed since childhood, then there is the possibility of freedom that is not the replacement or substitution of icons, but of total understanding. The outcome of that understanding is abandonment of the iconic self. You must realize that this abandonment is not a reaction. If it is a reaction then one is simply seeking a replacement, another new and different icon. In true understanding there is no reaction, there is simply understanding that sees the truth of the moment. It is the freedom of an unconditioned entity that accepts the truth of the moment without creating a psychological need to capture, quantify and idealize.

Trying to Capture Life

Have you had the feeling of wanting to hold on to some event , thing or relationship that has given joy or fulfillment? It seems we are ever wanting to capture and relive our moments of joy. We remember the past and remembering we desire some semblance of repetition. How do we feel things? What prompts the present emotion of past experience? Are we looking for an escape from insecurity? Is it, that the present moment lacks the imagined, the longed for? The mind which is grounded in the self that knows, wants to avoid the reality of the moment. One avoids accepting the moment, out of boredom or fear, so there is escape into what was. Unless the moment provides a familiar respite or a continuity to what is desired then it is avoided or imagined to be what it is not. Disappointment is largely the result of the illusion of projected desire that cannot be realized in the moment. A desire is an idealized image but the image is never the reality.

The mind tries to capture life, an imagined state of the ideal. We desire to become what we perceive to be the ideal. The ideal job or relationship. To acquire what is longed for as the solution to the "problem". How creative we are...mind is able to create the problem and the solution...and very often the solution is the problem. We think in terms of an end. The means is simply the path, obstacles to be overcome in our quest for the desired. But the path, the means is strewn with the destruction of a life half lived, a life filled with despair and loneliness. How much joy, peace and harmony do we miss in our drive for money, power, fame and religion? When we are thinking about the self or what the self can derive from helping others then we lack compassion. Do you assist others for the psychological benefit that you derive from it, or is it done for no reason, a totally selfless act of compassion? Are you anonymous in your approach to helping others, or do you seek acknowledgement? The mind that is trying to capture life is seeking to relive the glory of the illusion of the self absorbed.

If you love without condition or reward, then you act spontaneously to help others. A kind hand or even just a smile is enough to create peace and harmony. Those that seek out the poor and destitute with a mission to accomplish are in reality self serving. They want to feel good about themselves...its about and for the self that is seeking gratification, which is simply another form of greed. If you want to help the poor then start with your own greed see the depth of it, realize that they are poor because you are not. Then you may start living life with awareness and cease the activity of trying to capture the ideals of greed both the psychological and the material.

If you live through your idealistic beliefs then you are lost to the truth. The truth of the self is in freedom. Freedom from the known. The known that is the self serving captured ideals of religion, politics, cultural hegemony and materialistic/psychological greed. Can you be totally aware in the moment of the activity of the self that is seeking recompense for having to just live. Can you go deep within your own psyche and realize selflessness that is without the motivation of a captured ideal. It is the simplicity of the unconditioned, that which has realized the truth of the unknown.

A Realization of Actuality

Who are you? "Do you walk your talk"? as some would say. Are people looking for examples, or are they just trying to justify the inadequacy that they feel about themselves? Is it human nature to criticize to find fault with? Why do we constantly compare and judge? Perhaps it is that sense of competitiveness that may be the result of inbred feelings of inadequacy. Survival mechanisms invariably become psychological imperatives. The mind must find a way to cope with the conflict of being and becoming. It seems that most of us are trapped on this one way street that leads to a series of ups and downs, always mindful of the oblivion that awaits us. We are all caught up in this wave of recurring self doubt. We can never separate ourselves from our humanity, what we are in essence. No matter how illuminated or enlightened we become we are still just human beings that are subject to the physical and psychological frailties of the species. If we accept that we cannot be other than what we are then it may be possible to experience a psychological change that is not a transformation per se, but a realization of actuality. Seeing what we are in the moment without the image of what we want to be or should be. This may be the impetuous for an intelligence that is not a product or result of what has been. Is it possible to accept that we are the newness of the moment? An intelligence that is aware and sees beyond thoughts preoccupation with the self and its image. If this is possible then perhaps we will realize that all we have been in the past does not have to be what we are in the present moment.

The human experience does not have to be about conflict and violence. Humanity desires peace, but it is the desiring that prompts belief, suspicion, and division. Peace is only in the moment or it is not at all. Do not desire peace, but emanate the reality of it in the absolute moment. World conflict is a reflection of individual conflict. The greed of governments and of corporate entities are a reflection of the greed within. Do not say it is good or bad but look at the truth of it. Stay with the reality of the moment and observe that you are the conflict and the greed and that it is not something separate from you. Then you may experience a realization that creates a new perspective, an intelligence that is not about the self and what it desires.

Allowing the Moment

We have talked about the moment and how one can come to self realization that is not a movement of time. In the emptiness of the absolute moment is the true self, that which is beyond knowing. When one is in the moment there can only be acceptance, the acceptance of what is. The mind is not concluding or establishing opinions as to the activity of the moment, but simply acknowledging the truth of it, which is absent the minds projections. We are not agreeing or disagreeing or wanting to change the moment to suit our beliefs. In a sense we are the moment, allowing it to enfold us and nurture the freedom of the unknown. When you allow the moment then what is, is unconditioned, love that is without motive or agenda. Such a person emits an aura of peace and tranquility which disarms the conflict and hostility that is the projection of those who may be caught in the illusion of the known.

When you allow the moment you are able to clearly see the self in the other. The reflection of the known is in the known. Knowing mirrors knowing. Then you understand the self while observing the other. Because for the self that knows in every action there is reaction. That reaction is the self becoming the other. If the other is angry and you react with anger, then you become the other. If the other is disturbed and attacks you and you want revenge or psychological compensation, then you are disturbed. In all cases that involve the activity of the known of knowing, the result is always the instability and conflict of the self. Such a state of mind does not allow the moment, it rejects the unknown in favor of the prejudicial beliefs and opinions of the known.

This whole dynamic of human interaction can be very subtle. If one is not aware of the inner movement of ones own mind then it is easy to get caught up in the psychological nuances of a competitive self that is seeking the upper hand. One must be aware of the holier than thou syndrome that overtakes many that think they are immune to worldly conflict. The immunity of the self that knows manifest in many forms and formats. Suffice to say that a person who is living in and allowing the moment exists in the realization of the true self. Illumination that is the outcome of an unconditioned consciousness. One is unassumingly a light to all that one comes into contact with.

Conditioning and the Immunity of Self

People, friends, and acquaintances have expressed on occasion their inability to fully understand some of what I say and write about. I must confess that I too have difficulty completely understanding some of it. The spoken or written word is never the reality. The conditioned mind exist in the realm of thoughts movement, in its own self created reality. The word is always the past, the memory of a self that knows. It is the result of communication on one level. It is the superficial level of concept, of the conceptual, an approximation of actual reality. True reality is in the absolute moment, in which the self and the word is not. If there is naming in the moment then there is the illusion of a self that knows. It is simple and complex at the same time. The simplicity is in the absence of self. The complexity is in understanding the reality of emptiness of non-being through knowing and the known. The unknown which is the moment can never be known, so we use words to point too, to direct a possibility, but in the end one must simply allow what is hidden by the known to be realized but not captured. Illumination is a moment to moment dynamic realization that is absent knowing. Knowing being the conceptualizing movement of a defined self that accumulates. What is accumulated by the self contributes to the defined and results in the projected image of self in what is. That is why we say the observer is the observed. What we are (the defined) and what we see or observe, is in reality the projection of self. Our interpretation of what is observed is the reflection of self. Then it is understood that relationships mirror the self. If one is selfless then one mirrors truth and love.

Because the mind exist in a state of conditioned flux, understanding depends on where you are at psychologically. What is the state of ones mind? Is the mind consumed with its latest life struggle, and to what extent does this affect perception? It is important to quiet the mind, meditation that is not seeking a result. Meditation does not mean forcing ones self to sit in the lotus position and become a blanked out zombie. It means entering a psychological state of non-movement, of allowing the moment to enfold you. No matter what you are doing you can meditate in this fashion. Just be aware, choicelessly, of the self, not judging or concluding, just allowing what is. Then a wave of peace will come over you and you will be able to experience an intelligence that sees the truth of the moment. It is the dissipation of a self that knows.

People sometimes get obsessed with the idea of transformation, they are looking for an event that will cause them to live life in complete peace and harmony. Unfortunately people like this writer contribute to this illusion of a self that is transformed. In reality the self cannot be transformed. The self remains what it is no matter what ones level of realization. The self is the conditioning of the past, the defined elemental accumulation of what has been. The self by definition is immune to transformation. The immunity of the self is a non-negotiable fact. It cannot be what it is not. Then what is it that is transformed? Actually nothing is transformed. But the word is used to connotate a change in understanding and perception. The conditioned self interprets according to the content of the conscious mind. It is ones conditioned consciousness. When there is realization in the moment that is not a result of ones conditioning, then what understands is a consciousness that is unconditioned. It is an intelligence that is beyond thoughts prejudices'. Prejudice is the result of the known. The limitations of thoughts knowing.

Understanding that is not of the self is through the negation of the known. One does not become transformed, which is the illusion of self. One is already transformed. When the self is not, then the reality of truth is.

Sexual Communion

Friends have asked me to write about the truth of sexual intimacy. It is a very complex and deep area of human existence. The "subject" of sex has many stigma's attached to it. One is captured by ones own culture, experience, religious and ethical standards that may dictate how one is to act with regard to an area of human activity that is very important. All existence emanates a pro-creative energy force. In the human condition there is great difficulty in understanding this energy force because we are a captive of a consciousness that is seeking its own image in what is. Humans essentially are capable of creating a "reality of thought". We project the perceived reality of thought as the illusion of a self that is seeking its own expansion in what is.


If you have read previous writings (meditations) on this blog then you may realize that the self is seeking attachment that defines and gives legitimacy to thoughts reality. A person may be defined by religious affiliation, political ideals, or cultural norms. These associations establish rules of conduct that determine what is acceptable sexual behavior. They tend to require different degrees of suppression with regard to sexual desire. When there is suppression without understanding, then the result is deviancy. The pro-creative energy force must find an outlet. If it does not then there is the possibility of psychological instability. A psychosis of confusion may take hold that results in different degrees of psychological and/or physical conflict. confusion and violence. Such a being is the extreme of a mind that is caught in its own reality. It is the projection of a conditioned consciousness that has been and is being destructive rather than creative.


How do we understand this pro-creative energy force? We must first free ourselves of all our opinions and conclusions that are the result of our conditioning. If we are stuck in the rut of religious opinion be it Christian, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist or xyz then we will never be able to realize an understanding that transcends the illusion of a self that knows. One must be able to go beyond ones cultural prejudices. Put away all your new age non-sense, what you think you know about Tantra or the Kama Sutra. The truth comes out of emptiness, out of the unknown, that which is absent the self absorbed.


Love is the outcome of selflessness. If you are using your sexuality to acquire, to own, to become attached, then your relationship will be superficial. You will engage in the sex act as a means of domination, either aggressively or passively. When you become psychologically attached then there is expectation. It becomes a conditional relationship that feeds on manipulation and mutual exploitation. There is no freedom in such a relationship, because the primary goal is security and control. That security and control is the illusion of a self centered reality. Because we cannot accept the actual reality of life which is insecurity, we cannot live fully in the moment. We use the sex act as a means of escape from the truth of what is. What happens during coitus, orgasm? Psychologically at the moment of release, the self is not, the other is not, there is nothingness save the emptiness of that moment. In that moment one is totally free. But afterward the self reasserts as thought begins its movement.


We are essentially pure energy that is seeking an outlet. We want to control that energy, to channel it. But the mind is caught up in a conditioned state of self promotion that leads only to conflict and violence. When two people have realized the true self, a consciousness that is unconditioned, then there is the possibility of sexual communion. Then the sex act becomes something that transcends physicality. It is the selfless union of two entities that become one with existence. The two "are" love, one entity that is without reason or motivation. They require nothing of one another. There is only the freedom of the absolute moment, the unconditioned. It is passion and love that is without a self that is seeking. The emptiness of the truly sacred.

A Passion for Truth

One who lives in the emptiness of the moment is without the conflict of being and becoming. There is no abiding self that is seeking or projecting. Such a person exist in freedom and loves without condition. That love is not the result of an ideal that is seeking or requiring. One accepts the reality of the unknown, that is without fear or apprehension. That acceptance is the vulnerability of the non-dual, the selflessness of an illuminated consciousness.

If I wear the robes of a monk or sanyassin or if I place myself in a position of authority, am I not identified, defined and living in the illusion of a selfhood. I may deny myself the pleasures and comforts of the worldly, but I have not escaped the desires of a mind that is seeking the expansion of the self. One has just replaced one type of greed with another. The greed of spiritual superiority, the illusion of knowing and not knowing. One is still caught in the duality of a mind that projects division, conflict and violence.

How can a person live a truly selfless and illuminated existence? An existence that is without the angst of the defined. One has to realize completely and totally the freedom of the moment that is the negation of all attachment and belief. The dissipation of the desire to be in all its forms. The outcome of true deep realization is anonymity, to live anonymously. One who walks the earth without motivation or purpose. Who lives just to live in peace and harmony with all existence, sentient and non-sentient. A psychologically stable entity that is without the limitations of a restrictive self. One may say that it is not possible to live such a life in today's world. But that is because you are trapped by a mind that lives through the authority of a self that knows. You have always escaped the unknown through the illusion of a self that thinks it knows. You feed the authority of the self a daily diet of recurring yesterdays. The repetition of memorized fallibility, the conflict and violence of the known. You cannot see through the dense fog of the known. It is your own self imposed limitation. Only you can free yourself. No amount of reading or teaching of others will bring you to that place. It is passion for the truth of what is, of the eternal moment, that will set you free.

The Conflict of Choice

Some people have asked how is it possible to be totally free when life demands that you make decisions and choices that invariably cause some conflict? This is a very fundamental question that requires careful attention to the movement of self. The key is motivation. What is it that motivates the self to perform? You must be able to carefully and attentively observe the obvious and the hidden motivations of that which is seeking the promotion of self interest. As long as you are grounded in the self as the activity of the known you will be in conflict and that conflict will project its self in what is. Total freedom is not a choice it is the reality of the unknown. One does not become free. Freedom is not a result, it is the outcome of negation. When a person breaks through the illusion of the self, then what is...is freedom. The mind that is caught in the known, in the illusion of self, cannot grasp freedom that is not a conceptual ideal or goal. Such a mind is controlled by motivation and acquisition therefore one cannot realize the truth of the absolute moment which is total freedom.

In total freedom there is a type of desolation of consciousness that is beyond the conditioned minds capacity. The freedom that we are alluding to is very difficult to grasp because it defies definition and "knowing". It is in essence a state of existence that knows no bounds, that is without the limitations of thoughts reasoning parameters. Such a mind is beyond the binding elements of a self that is seeking definition in the projected image of that which knows.

In true freedom there is no attachment or identity in or to what is. When there is no psychological attachment there is no conflict. If you can realize in the moment and see that motivation is the result of attachment and that attachment is the means to further motivation then you will have realized a truth that is beyond the capacity of the known. Then all decisions and choices are without a self that is caught in the illusion of attachment and its equation of identity. Then there is not the need for one to be equal to a choice. Equality of choice means that one is defined by and equal to the choices that are made. When one is choicelessly aware there no defined entity, therefore there is no attachment. Freedom is the outcome of choiceless awareness that evolves into the timeless state of the absolute moment. So if you are "thinking" that you a free then you are not. If you dwell on the ideal of freedom then what ever you experience will be the bondage of the self and nothing more. The ideal is the product of a conditioned consciousness, it is the past, the known. Freedom is in the reality of what is, the unknown, that is absent an entity that knows.