The Reality of Insecurity

Why would a person be willing to live in insecurity? True reality is a very elusive. We spend most of our lives escaping the truth. We justify, excuse, moderate and downplay our propensity to adjudicate according to our own self absorbed projection of reality. Basically we live in the illusion of our own making. From that illusion we formulate opinion and conclusion. Because we are caught in desire, which is the expression of our search for security, we cling to faith and hope which results in conformity to ideas and personalities. One becomes disintegrated because of the inherent conflict in the ideological and the charismatia. When one tries to reduce the perceived fear of insecurity, one is inclined to sacrifice the truth of the moment. The illusion of self does not allow for seeing in the moment, because it is escaping into the movement of time, the projection of what should be. The mind that is in illusion is obsessed with the future, because the mind sees the future as change. The reality is that change can only occur in the moment, but because mind is escaping from insecurity it cannot realize and grasp the truth of the moment. When one accepts the reality of insecurity, then a change takes place in the psyche. The mind becomes quiet and empty of thoughts movement as projected reality. It is realization of the timelessness of the moment and the dissipation of the illusion and duality of self.

Projected reality, the future, is ones escape mechanism. When one accepts the insecurity of the moment, as a fact not as a supposition, then one is vulnerable. Vulnerability means that one has let go of all hope and faith as an escape from the truth of the absolute moment. There is change in the insecurity of the moment, because one faces ones self and accepts responsibility for the reality of that moment. The conscious awareness of the moment brings about a dissipation of the self that is projecting. Selfless awareness is the consciousness of the unconditioned, that which is devoid of the historical self. It is the only way in which truth is realized. That realization is devoid of thoughts movement as the self, it is negation of all save an intelligence that cannot be named or known. The peace, freedom and beauty of the unknown.

So if one can realize the freedom and reality of insecurity as the truth of the moment, then one will have realized love that is without condition or purpose. The self cannot exist in insecurity, because its nature is to escape, to move into the thoughts illusion. When one exist as that which is insecure then one lives as the unconditioned. It is the beauty and freedom of an intelligence that cannot be defined.

Do You Look Through the Self?

What is the relationship between the movement of time and the known? What is the result of that relationship? Civilization and culture are the result of the minds perceived need to conform. That conformity bridges the illusion of perceived individuality and the consciousness of a collective. It is the relationship that exist and is projected in the nominal activities of a conditioned consciousness that is both individualistic and collectivistic. Time as a movement through space is the result of thought as the self. The self is identity through memory as the known. If there is no self is there time? Obviously not, time/space is the result of the illusion of self. What is observed as time/space is the reflection of thoughts movement as the self. If one tries to idealize this as a concept, it cannot be understood. It must be realized directly, bypassing the self that is attempting to create the psychological ideal. In the absolute moment there is no time as the self. There is only the truth of what is. The truth is in the stillness of the moment. But mind cannot capture it, because thinking involves thought which is time as a movement of the self that is seeking to understand through its conditioning which is the past.

Realization is through the negation of the self. The outcome is understanding that is an intuitive insight into whole field of thought. It is "looking" without the self that is conditioned. To see the reality of the moment one must first be aware of the self that is projecting opinion and conclusion. If one is completely aware then there is a dissipation of the self. Then it is possible to look without discrimination and see the true reality of the moment, not the self created reality of the conditioned mind. Most of us go through our entire lives in one mind set. We are the sum total of the interpretation of all we have experienced. We have never looked or realized except as the mind that is caught in its own destructive illusion. What we are, our views, our responses are all the product of our own self created neurosis. Through counseling and mediation we may modify that neurosis, but we remain the same, filled with fear and conflict. We are doomed to the repetition of the content of our own conditioned consciousness.

Is it possible for the mind to realize its own predicament? How that it is trapped in the reality of its own making. Is it possible to see directly the truth of the self in the absolute moment? For the mind to be in a state of non-movement so that something totally new is possible? Perhaps you have had some realization and have sought out answers in religious or spiritual practices'. But there is no lasting or meaningful change, you just accept it and practice some meaningless ritual that gives you a sense of accomplishment or gratification. But you have not been able to break free from the tyranny of self.

If there was a formula that could be followed or a system of meditation and self realization then one could just follow steps to realize the truth and find illumination and enlightenment. But there is no "true path". Paths and systems only reinforce the self that is seeking. One is only furthering ones illusion. For one to be completely free one must walk alone and blaze a new trail in the realization of the true self. Each person must find their own way without the crutch of "booby brained guru's" who live in the illusion of their own self importance. The first step in freedom is the letting go of all outside influences. This sounds counter productive because how can you seek and find if there is no one to guide you? One must realize that truth is found through the negation of all that the mind has created as answers to perceived problems. This pathless way is not easy, it involves catastrophic psychological transformation, in which the old and repetitive self is totally realized with all its conflicted and violent tendencies. Seeing the self without the veil of its illusion of respectability and justification is a disturbing and unsettling realization. But it is the beginning of a new intelligence, one that is totally free and totally in the moment. It is to be reborn anew in each moment and to realize the dynamics of an intelligence that is not a repetition of what has gone on before, ones historical self. To look at each encounter with a fresh and youthful mind is to be open to the possibility of change that is without precedent.

What is "Actually" Owned?

What is the subtle psychological result of a mind that is seeking to acquire? Why does the mind want to own? What is the relationship between "ownership" and the one who owns? We are not just referring to the physical, but also the acquisition of knowledge as a psychological ideal. As an organism one must acquire in order to sustain life and to exist in a society of mutual benefit. At some point acquisition moves from being the simplicity of sustenance to greed and conspicuous consumption. It becomes the complex psychological gluttony of a mind that is in conflict and fear.

The mind that is held in the grasp of the desire to acquire more and more is caught in fear and the denial of insecurity as the reality of what is. This fear feeds on its self, it is the state of a mind that lacks deep understanding of the true realities of existence. Because the self is based on the duality of thought, the me and the not me, one seeks identity and individuality in the acquisition of material and psychological accumulation. Such a mind creates and exist in the illusion of a complexity that is the result of the desire to accumulate. One is in a psychological state of mind that is unable to realize the simplicity and truth of the actual moment.

It is very difficult to understand completely the psychological implications of what it is that drives us to accumulate. There is a complex neurosis that is involved in having and acquiring. One cannot begin to understand until progress is made toward realizing the subtlety of the self that is constantly in an identity crisis. The mind must utilize the ideal of accumulation to be aware of its movement as the self that is seeking the identity of self. That understanding if complete within the moment results in the letting go of psychological dependence on "things" and "ideas". One may be experiencing a freedom that cannot be explained and is beyond knowing.

The mind cannot understand its self directly, it realizes the truth indirectly through what it is not. Negation gets to the root of existence. It is the commonality of all that is. If one is totally aware of the self that is creating its own reality through identification with accumulation, then what is accumulated will dissipate with the realization of the true self. The true self, that which is unconditioned sees through the illusion of the self created. The "owner" is a reflection of that which he or she owns. It is the self created "ideal" of the sense of ownership that the mind seeks to capture not the "actual" ownership. "Actual" ownership is of its self empty of any meaningful significance. There is in reality very little that a person needs to exist in a joyful state. If one is truly illuminated one needs nothing. The fact is, if one has realized a conscious state of existence that does not rely on accumulation, then the moment is the only reality. What is in the moment is accepted without conclusion. When the mind is without conclusion there exist an intelligence that sees into the nature of all conflict. That moment is then changed, not through the activity of self absorbed motivation, but as the outcome of a mind that negates through selfless vulnerability.

More on Freedom

Political organizations talk about freedom, but it is only "allowed freedom". Freedom that is controlled by those who are in authority is not freedom at all, but only the tyranny of the few. Essentially government and the media are controlled by those with "asset influence". They are the gods of wealth and power. Because most of us worship wealth and acquisitiveness, we are influenced and enamored by their achievements. It is most probable that the image of the freedom that you think you have is a fantasy. Freedom that is a reality starts in the mind. If one is not psychologically free then what ever follows externally is a projection of that lack of freedom. Psychological freedom means that you are not aligned with belief in any system or organization. More importantly one is not aligned with any self created image of individuality. This is a statement that is most difficult to understand, because total freedom includes freedom from the self that is creating its own authority as a concept or ideal. Many will then conclude that it is not possible to be totally free. But that is because they fear true freedom. True freedom means that one lives in insecurity. It is the reality of the unknown. Truth resides in the unknown, in that which is absent the stigma of knowing.

True freedom does not mean that you can do what you want with impunity. It is a state of existence which is the realization of the true self. With that realization comes the acceptance of responsibility for the care and nurturing of all existence. In order for one to be truly free one must be vulnerable to the freedom of others. To be vulnerable means to accept diversity and not to judge, compare or conclude. When the self is not then the truth is. That truth can only be realized within freedom that is of the unknown.

The simple fact is the mind that lives in illusion does not want to be free. Because the mind is programed from birth to conform to existing standards of behavior, both from that which is taught and from that which is the result of ones experiences, one is in a prison. That mental prison is the psychologically familiar, it provides a sense of security. That security is the image of self that is able to predict and thus conform as an action of the self that knows. The mind that is in the absolute moment and has fully realized the implications of the activity of self sees that the illusion of the self rests in the known and truth in the unknown.

None of this will make any sense or will have the least effect on the conscious mind if one is not aware of the movement of thought as the division of self. As long as there is the division of self as an individuality separate from what is observed, there will be illusion. Freedom starts with the realization of self as the projection of what is. Simple awareness of this activity of projecting the self brings about its dissipation and realization of the true self. Freedom is not something acquired, it is a state of existence that is without the self that is creating its own reality. This is why the true self remains unattached and without identity, it sees what is, in actuality. It is the consciousness of the unconditioned, that which is without the projection of self knowing or the self as the known.

Because the truth of freedom comes from within it cannot be denied by any external force. Though one may be locked away in a prison or denied physical freedoms by an organization or authoritative regime, one is in reality totally free. The essence of true freedom is inactivity of the self as the illusion of time. In the freedom and stillness of the moment is the illumination of that which has no beginning or end. Those that are caught in the movement of the self as the perception of reality are the ones who are in prison. It is the prison of the self created conflict and violence of the acquisitive and greedy mind.

What About You?

Why is that we are unable to get past our own opinions and prejudice? We cannot look at things simply as they are, we must inject our own personal equation into every situation. Our confused and conflicted views compound problems that we ourselves are the cause of. We are so incredibly inept at realizing the simplicity of the moment. This is the life that we project, one of physical violence and of the psychological violence of greed. Many of us claim through the conformity of non-violence to be all about "peace", but our identification with a separative activity is just as violent as any other group that has an agenda or belief. So we continue to go through life with our petty differences and through identification and attachment to systems and organizations seek to find the "greater good". Why do we continue to go down the same road? Why are we not able to see the truth of the moment? Are our minds so "gunked " up with all the garbage that we have been brainwashed with all of our lives that we are incapable of just looking without the interference of our own stupidity?

How is it possible to look with a fresh mind, one that is not embroiled in the haze of its own making? Does one have the passion and the fortitude to find out the truth? Are you capable of throwing it all out the window, all the accumulated justifications for your violent existence, and live simply? Living a life of freedom that is not the result of some ideal, that has no goal or agenda, is the highest form of intelligence. One has to see directly the state of ones own mind. The realization of the confusion and contradiction of ones own mind is a most difficult task. You are asking the mind to realize its self. Is self realization possible if the mind is caught up in its own perceived inadequacy. Is there actual self realization or are we only referencing through our own limitations? How is it possible to go beyond thoughts limitations?

There is no formula for the realization of absolute truth which is the realization of the true self. All one can do is realize the futility of thoughts movement and its illusion of duality. One can think in terms of an ideal such as the "Power of Now" or of the "Flowering of Consciousness", but all these aphorisms are just the projected illusion of the self absorbed. They are not the truth of self realization, of seeing the reality of ones own conflict and confusion. They only cover up the reality of ones division and isolation. They are another drug for ones addiction to self importance and self aggrandizement. If one is truly free then there is no need to cling to the ideas of self appointed authorities. Do not create authority inside the mind by giving authority to another.

We are caught in a repetition of the content of the conditioned mind. As long as thought references its past as the solution to the present, we are bound to a repetitive circle of actions that are the result of fear. The realization of minds activity as a self promoting entity that is destructive and controlling is to cease the activity of reactionary self projection. Is it possible for you to look to see ones self this very moment? To observe without the observer who is clever, calculating, and controlling. Is it possible for you to free yourself this very moment? Freedom that is not the result of an activity, but the outcome of negation.

Individuality and the Unconditioned

As humans we all have physical and psychological traits that are the result of our heritage. Genecologically we are cast with elements that allow for differentiation in appearance and physical agility. Culturally and in terms of ethnic origin we display differences that are the result of our environment. All these perceived differences are compounded further by language barriers that result in difficulties with communication. Language its self is one of the most insidious causes of irrationality, confusion and misunderstanding. All the aforementioned attributes combine to formulate an identity and an individuality within an identified cultural and ethnic tribe. When a person conforms to a group of similar individuals, psychologically one finds to a degree, the illusion of security. The result of this feeling of security is the desire to commit to actions that further the euphoria of conformity. The mind seeks understanding and definition through the division of thought. Thought as the self attains its personification as one becomes more identified with the activity of conformity as an end to a means. The end being the defined self, the me, I, the one who is and thinks as an individuality. But individuality as a concept is very misleading. The individual is the result of conformity, which is by definition not individualistic at all, but by all accounts pluralistic. The psychology of the self is a hodge poge of identification with collected memories that have been given some semblance of logic that projects a cognizant image of individuality. One can never escape the self illusion of individuality as defined egoity. It can only be understood and that understanding varies with ones level of consciousness. When ones consciousness is unconditioned, that is one has complete understanding that is not a projection of the the dual nature of thought, then there is a dissipation of self. It is a dissipation of the activity of conformity. Then mind is in a state of timelessness. There is no movement of the self as an identity in the moment. There is only the truth of the moment. That truth is not a universal realization or some sort of ethereal intelligence. It is the moment in which the self has realized its own movement and as such sees into the illusion of the image producing mechanism of thought. The out come of this insight is the true self. That which is without the conditioning of the past as a defined individuality.


What makes the illusion of self such a psychological complexity is the minds inability to observe independently of its own time based intelligence. When thought is caught in time, in the movement of past, present and future, it is bonded to a self created reality. That reality becomes the neurosis of a mind that is enslaved by a consciousness that is the result of its conditioning. When one is totally aware of that conditioning then it is possible to realize a consciousness that is independent of all the influences of a mind that has been trapped by its own self created illusions. Total awareness is only in the moment, there can be no movement of the self created as an individuality. One gives up the illusion of self as the known for the reality and truth of the unknown.

We exist in a world that constantly bombards us with images of the ideal. The mind clings to the fantasy of the ideal which further exasperates the crisis of identity that all humans grapple with. To let go of all this symbolism of faith and hope is to realize that which is not of thought. It is an understanding that is the freedom of the absolute moment. The moment as the totality of existence, the selfless consciousness of the unconditioned.

J.Krishnamurti

People have asked me about J. Krishnamurti because what is said is often of the same context. It is true he was the light to my own understanding. It is difficult, if not impossible to explain in words that which is a light to all who have realized his passion and love of humanity. J.K. was the Amitabha Buddha, the light of eternal understanding and compassion. But to truly understand his teaching one must see ones self in his words. And having fully understood and realized the self, one must become one with the moment of that illumination. The many are the one and through the one the dissipation of the self that is seeking. Now for one there is no teacher, the egoity of J.K. has ceased to exist, yet that which is eternal, the unknown as the substance of true reality, the unconditioned "is".

One must not dwell on the teachings of the past, one must realize the moment as the only true reality. It is the realization of the moment that echo's the essence of J.K.'s teachings and his insights. One cannot know the mind of J.K. but one can realize ones own illusion and division. One must resist the temptation to follow a teacher, to place one on a pedestal to be looked upon as an authority. Buddha often admonished his followers to not believe in his words but to find out the truth for themselves. It is of paramount importance that one "go it alone" for then it becomes your insight and your illumination, not something which is fostered by the actions of another. Freedom means freedom that is the negation of all including the teachings of Sages and Buddhas of every era. The mind must be as a blank page, so that what is realized is the new and never before in the absolute moment. The truth comes from emptiness, the stillness of a mind that is not distorted by the accumulated words and teachings of others, including the musing of the self absorbed. All authority must cease if one is to realize the true self, that which is the consciousness of the unconditioned. Teachers and systems that lead one in a never ending search are the illusion of that which seeks its own projection in what is. The authority of the other and the self is the illusion of the acquisitive mind. The mind that seeks accomplishment and gratification is the mind that is in conflict and confusion. Such a mind will only find the image of its own arrogance and self centeredness in the tenets and methods of so called spiritual masters.

So one should read and listen to others directly with a mind that is free of any compulsion to cling to ideals or images. It is important to realize the self as one takes in what is said or written, to be aware of the movement of self and its propensity to compare and conclude. To maintain a consciousness that is choicelessly aware from moment to moment. One will realize the self in all relationships and its dissipation will reveal an intelligence that transcends the duality of thought. But it must not be the result of the perceived righteousness of another as the authority of a so called illuminating doctrine. There must be a dissipation of the past of that which is the dead words of others. The truth is in the moment and ones realization is fresh and new from moment to moment.

It Cannot be Taught

On occasion people will question me about what I teach. The reply is that I don't teach anything."Yes but you write and talk about such things that imply a Buddhist perspective and even quote Buddha", they will insist. Yes that is true, but what is it that is actually taught, do I say to you, you must believe this or that and give you a formula? The fact is that what ever is retained is your own interpretation and based on your perception. The truth cannot be the known therefore it cannot be taught. One talks in terms of the Buddha because he is the root of self realization. The beginning of understanding is within the perception of self. One starts out with the illusion which is where one is at mentally and through that illusion realizes its own movement as the self. It is like one hand trying grab its self, its impossible, but through the activity one begins to realize the actual futility of thought as the illusion of self. So if I teach you something, then what is that something? Do you see that that something is entirely your creation. It is your mind, your thoughts. An idea or ideal is the product of the mind that is seeking. So to go beyond thought, is to realize the origin of thought. That realization cannot be taught. The truth is in the moment and its realization is when thought as the self is not. Then there is no teacher, and nothing to be learned. There is only the truth of the moment.

It is quite simply freedom that knows no limit. To live in total freedom is to escape all notions of self identity and thus attachment to the known. When one is not attached to the illusion of self which is the personified image of reality, then there is true freedom. Does one see that it is not freedom from something, but freedom that is the essence of existence? It is very subtle, the realization does not come from the self that is seeking, but is the outcome of understanding that is the negation of self. It is not a goal or aspiration, but simply is what is when the self is not. Since what is, in the absolute moment defies all definition, the mind is not capable of knowing it. The mind becomes one with the unknown. A mind that dwells in the unknown is free to realize understanding that transcends thoughts limitations. One loves without condition and without a consciousness that is conditioned. Such a person is without the conflict and violence of a mind that is seeking its own agenda and self promotion at the expense of all others, including the earth and its inhabitants. Such a person lives anonymously, without the need for self aggrandizement and egoity.

If it cannot be taught and it cannot be learned, then what is left? You are what is left, the truth about the self. Look directly at the self see its reflection in daily life, in each and every moment. Be aware of the self, choicelessly, not judging or justifying. See the truth of the moment, accept the reality of the unknown and you will change. But it will not be the change you imagined, it will be something totally new and different.

Silence of Mind

When one is in a state of consciousness that is not the result of thoughts movement then there is an all pervading silence of mind. There may be a myriad of activities that one is occupied with both on the physical and the psychological level. But those activities in no way disturb that consciousness. It is totally without purpose or identity. It exist as a moment to moment illumination of the truth of the unknown. It sees through the illusion of a self centered reality. The mind ceases its activity of being drawn into the conflict of opposition. Each moment is lived completely free of the residue of resentment or adjudication. There is no retention of the moment as the unfinished or the unresolved. One is totally free to understand each moment as it arises and dissipates. This is the consciousness of the unconditioned, that which cannot be identified or named.

How is it possible to live such a life? A life that is without opinion or judgement. A life that is lived in complete freedom. One must of course make decisions and choose to do something or not do something. But what is the result of this activity? Is one attached to something or identified with something? If one maintains a vulnerability in the moment and makes choices out of the necessity of living, of maintaining the organism, then that movement is not part of the illusion of becoming. The difference is awareness that is the realization of the illusion of self. One lives as the unknown, not being attached to any belief or organization. In complete freedom there is an understanding that is not the result of an agenda or an identification. The outcome of this consciousness that is free and without conditioning is the ability to let go of each moment as it arises and dissipates. One does not carry around the old, the baggage of accumulated experience with its conflict, violence and self indulgence.

The self is the conditioned, the identified. It is the known which seeks continuity in attachment to ideals and images. The result of this attachment is the need to enhance the self created through the activity of acquisition and identification with a perceived elite. It is an activity which reinforces the illusion of individuality as a conformity to what is. When one moves through the illusion of the self created one is trapped by thoughts need to find self gratification and self acknowledgement in ones choices. This is the tyranny of a mind that is self absorbed. One never stops seeking and avoiding.

When the mind is still and silent then there is the possibility of that which is beyond thought. It is a relationship of consciousness and the absolute moment which is free of thoughts movement. One cannot realize this stillness and silence as a goal or attainment. It is within the freedom of a moment that is timeless and without any spatial reference. To look for it or try to make it happen through an activity of thought is to destroy the possibility. The unknown cannot be known, but it is all that there is. All idea and concept must be realized as the illusion of the self. A consciousness that is unconditioned is the outcome a mind that is totally free, that is silent and without any notion of its silence. It does not comprehend its own silence. It seeks not to capture or define. This silence is the oneness of all creation, that which has no purpose or meaning.